Book Review of Ready: How to Know When to Go and When to Stay

By David Richo

Published 2022 by Shambhala Publications

Synopsis: The guide to finding your perfect timing for life's biggest decisions—whether to stay or go in relationships, jobs, locations, and everything that matters most.

Do we stay in what we know? Or is it the right time to leave and make a change? In more than 50 years as a psychotherapist David Richo has been asked versions of this question more than any other. He has coached countless people of all ages through agonizing decisions related to their partnerships, their career, their home, their faith. In Ready, he shares the deep wisdom we need to make these decisions—and feel confident in following through. The book looks at the mystery of timing, why we stay too long, why we leave too soon, and what it feels like when the timing is right.

Richo shows that readiness is about more than just making a choice. Being ready means we understand ourselves deeply – we are prepared to take action (and staying is an action!), and we are equipped with what it takes to follow through. Filled with relatable stories and helpful practices, including meditation, self-inquiry, journaling, and affirmations, Ready helps us understand our own perfect timing to stay or to go.

My opinion: I struggled to connect with this book. The topic should have been perfect for my recent work situation and questions I'm having about what to do next job-wise. Unfortunately, Richo uses a lot of metaphor and esoteric language about big, important ideas with little practical advice that I could see myself using. The book is written using the 'we' pronoun, which took some getting used to and reminded me of the way some counsellors or therapists talk. Many of the examples were about family or childhood trauma, which would resonate with some readers and not others. I did enjoy the structure – sections of poetry, clear headings and ideas summarised in tables. I also appreciated the varied religious and spiritual references and I can see how that would suit some readers. It's short and readable, but I didn't find it useful.

If the topic sounds helpful for you and you are not put off by exploring metaphor, poetry and religious texts to rethink your decisions, then I would recommend reading Ready.

My style tends to be pragmatic and I want practical strategies I can implement. If this suits you, book a session to make a personalised plan for being ready for the next steps in your career.

Another reviewer says: 'It treats the audience as intelligent individuals who are self-aware enough to diagnose their own issues. Clear charts and enumerated attributes summarize the differences between codependency and neediness, between pity and compassion... The goal is to break through stalemates. Sets of reflection questions and meditations, designed for concentrated weeks of soul-searching, light the path. There are also affirming declarations to repeat daily. Quotes from the Bible and other scriptures are gentle signposts. Developing thankfulness and lovingkindness, rather than wallowing in regret, is the aim... The indecisive can take heart!: Ready is an invaluable modern-day guide for the perplexed.'

Rebecca Foster on Foreword Reviews

Other books by this author (that I haven't read yet so make no guarantees about):

• How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving (2002)

• Daring to Trust: Opening Ourselves to Real Love and Intimacy (2010)

Other books recommended by GoodReads (that I've added to my to-read list):

• The Good Enough Job: Reclaiming Life from Work by Simone Stolzoff

• The Stress Prescription: Seven Days to More Joy and Ease by Elissa Epel

Comment below to recommend other books. If you're interested in talking about books at our Ex-teachers' Club on Tuesdays, click the button.